Mother stop! What are you doing? Stay away from the oven! Do you know what happened to an innocent lady in Texas? The oven shot her! So, from now on no more baking! We will eat everything raw! What will happen if the oven shoots you? I will have to climb the mountains to find that special snake the poison of which makes white clothes even whiter! That is why I am telling you...we are going to eat the stake raw...the way the French eat it...
Are you laughing? Well...I am not! Because all these useless but interesting information that can be found everyday around the internet, have made me see life from a different perspective. To tell the truth this information is not AT ALL useless, on the contrary it can be used to form a very useful book of instructions! How else would we know what to do if during grilling, our oven decided to shoot us, if there wasn't the incident with the lady in Texas? And how else would we know that instead of spending hours in hand-wash our clothes to extinguish a blood stain, we can very easily go to our yard, get the first snake we see passing by, get its poison and get rid of the stain?
I don't know about you, but I have been mutated to a sponge. Every morning I gather all this useless-useful information, read every word very carefully and then...move to the second stage: The reading of chain letters! I read them but do not forward them. Maybe this is why I am going through a period of misfortune, although with all these threats I receive by the specific letters, by now I should have had all kinds of sicknesses, be totally paralyzed, the sky should have fallen on my head and who knows what else! So...the fact that I am still alive and kicking, means either that someone breaks into my e-mail and forwards the letters on my behalf, or that those people who compose those letters have not yet reached perfection in the revenge mechanism in case someone like me deny to forward them!
You may ask...why I even bother to spent my time with all this? I honestly do not know. Maybe it is because I have developed some type of an addiction to useless information that creates a desire for more! I could also say that the reading of such information could be developed in a relaxation mean! Others do yoga, I read about the new iron board that was designed by a Welsh company, which apart from being a necessary assisting to ironing mean, at the same time it proceeds to a sensual striptease as a motive for men who deny or women who hate to iron!
If you are still not convinced of the usefulness of all useless information I have one last point for you! How else would you have learnt about the killer-oven, the snake-bleach and the iron board-temptation? Is it that by any chance you are addicted too???
IMPORTANT NOTICE: If you believe that all the above is just a product of my uncontrollable imagination, you are mistaken! It is all true!!
Katerina Kourtessi
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